You Can't Put Your Own C*ck On A Pedestal | Not Well Podcast (Gay Hosts)

Oh, oh, we look better now. Okay. I don't even have a beer. Okay. Cause we got a crack. Let's crack the beers. Let's get started on this wild adventure.  Hello, everybody. Welcome to another episode of not well, I'm Bobby and I'm Jim and we are, it's your lucky day. It's a Friday. This doesn't happen a lot anymore.

It doesn't happen a lot.  It's my first Friday off in weeks and we're really excited. Are we cheersing? Yeah, we should cheers.  Oh wow. We're so classy. We're like, actually, that's  Oh, what's the APV on this? No, it's only six and a half. That's why I look, that's why I was looking. Cause I'm like, that tastes like it's going to be strong.

It tastes like syrupy. It tastes like it's going to knock me the fuck out. This one will stick to your teeth. Um, Speaking of, what's that little thing? What are you speaking of? The teeth? What's that little thing there? I don't know. It's probably  a little flake. It could be from my tattoo. It's almost healed.

It's so hot. I'm getting another one while we're in New York. That's why I think Sunday, when you want to have Sunday fun day, Spencer! I'm going to be having Sunday fun day with just a little flake. Just something little. I knew there was some reason. No! No, no, honestly, the reason is because this last time we had one hour of sleep.

I know that's why I was like, for me, I'm not doing a morning, but I don't know if I need to wait till five, but then I'm like, what's the difference? Cause if I get here at seven, it's still light out. I guess we're not like on the West coast either.  Yeah. We don't get any time back. It's literally an hour though.

The flight's an hour. So that's why I was like, I'm just going to leave late, but that's my thing. It's like, I was like, why would I, okay, so I'll rush back. And then what? I only got two hours of sleep. And then I'd go to sleep here and wake up at five anyway. So why not just literally wake up in the city or just lay around when I get home?

So we can have lunch in New York. I mean, that's what I want to do, right? I want to go get a, it gives us an additional Maranara pizza. No. Remember that? Are we going to see Ms. No, why not? At a Reba Reba. Let's go cry. Let's go cry. Oh my God. Maybe you've got a lot to cry about. I actually, I don't know. I do. I feel  last week I had a moment.

I had a moment on my bed.  Tell me about it. But it was a good moment. I think you just spit on my mouth. No, I think it's cause you touched my beer thing and then you've been doing.  You got my beer thing. It's delicious. It's always so good. I always get an extra beer. Another dollar. Are you kidding me on there?

Why does anybody make any other cheese?   Why? Why? When you're making  all of that beer. Okay. Okay. So, okay. Now tell me about your, your moment though. So I was up. In my bedroom after going on a walk, and Penny came up, sittin on my Cuz I just  to lay on my bed. So do I, without anything happening, I'm , yep, same.

For no other reason, Matt's , Matt's like, what are you doing up there? He thinks I'm , jerking off. No, I do that too! I'm literally laying in the bed under the fan, just laying there, looking at my phone, and just Drifting off. I do that all the time. Yeah. He's always like, what are you doing up there though?

I'm like, I'm not sleeping. I'm not masturbating, so don't worry. I'm resting. And I get to escape the TV noise. I think that's what it is. I  don't want to hear the TV. I want to sit on my bed. After work, my favorite thing to do is literally come inside, strip down, and just lay on my bed and be like dead. And then look at my phone.

I immediately change. When I'm going to be home and I know I'm home, I'm changing. I'm in pajamas right away. Oh, what's the first thing you take off?  Shirt or pants? Good question. What did I do? I think I did shirt today. Okay. Yeah. Shirt. Cause shirts not as real as pants. Pants are  your actual, I actually take off pants first. 

Yeah, that's weird. You're hiding the belly. I  know. That's why I'm sure it goes back to youth or just my trauma for the past 20 years. Exactly. Well, yeah, but it started, well, it's also , yeah, I think so. Yeah. You don't want to be the fat kid at the pool. So why would you, are we playing shirts?  So I'm up on my bed.

I think we had just gone on a walk. Penny was up there. She was laying next to me. I was just petting her and I was playing music on the little air pod mini thing or whatever that I don't know what that's called, the little air tag, the apple playing music thing sitting on the  bigger than the puck,  the sphere sphere.

So then I'm laying there and this song that  I don't know if you've heard the full version or if you just heard  the one or two lines on tick tock, which most people have.  This song, um, claims to be from Little Life.  Is it the one that's  Fallon? Fallon? No. Fallon?  No, I'll play Play a clap. Let me just play a clap.

Is it like, is 

this one that everybody says, listen to a song on your cry?  Oh, is that a thing? I don't know.  Cause I just did it and I didn't even, I don't have TikTok. Everybody does it at the beginning.  I had never heard the lyrics or anything.  It's really, really moving.  Maybe I'm being cheesy. How. How.  Would you have me described? 

How would you have me described?  Ooh, 

with words you think that  I like?  It's the, it's the refrain that we'll get to.  I, I'm digging.  I found out that I could take you out here. We go a little bit, a little bit, a little bit harder than I thought they said a little bit. Fine. A little bit. Sure. 

So sweet. So that's where I was  in that mode of , if this is so true,  this is hard. It's harder than people said it would be, but it's also . It's pretty incredible. I'm older than I thought I would be. Right. But I think it's great. , I'm here. Yeah. I'm like, I just got to go on a walk. It was nice out.

I smelled so many beautiful flowers. The lilacs are in bloom. It's kind of. I pettied my dog on the bed. It's so comfortable. I'm like, yeah, but I think I like this little life. So here's the thing. So I was crying. I'm not  sobbing, but you were just , kind of, sometimes you have to have that moment of like, it, you just need it.

Gratitude. Yeah. No, honestly, because sometimes I'll lay here and I'll go as I'm getting older. I'll be , well, I need to really start  appreciating just trips and be able to walk down the airplane terminal or  things  you're not in a wheelchair. You're not having a Walker people  one day you could be, I mean, It's an accident away there.

You're one catastrophe away from a life and we all think it's going to be the same thing over and over and over. And at some point it's going to catch you or some point, something's going to change and you're going to have to react. And that's why life is so, and you can either fight it or go with it.

The problem with people try to fight it. Well, and that's why, as you get older, I think the people who make that fighting don't fight, they're just like, well, so I tell Sabrina all the time. I'm like, we're just flowing. We're just going, I mean, there's no, you can't stop. And you can't go back. Yeah. You can only go forward.

That's true. So don't look back, look forward. And I was trying to make like a little, I like that. Don't look back. While I was listening to Taylor Swift. So, uh, and there's the thing trying to write a song. She came out with her album today. Did you have a little crying moment though? Is that. What you in the past couple of weeks, are you in that mood or mode or so?

What I realized though about myself, and I didn't realize it until this past year  since the, so park city happened so fun, really just  a fun time. I felt  I was my pure self. I thought you were there. And we do recall there was some.  Developments there as well. And there was, it was, there was some serotonin or what's it called?

Dopamine, if you will.  Dopamine, if you will.  Yes. So  I got home and I went to a complete deep dive, spiral, deep, dark place, DDP. So then I finally kind of battled back out DDP. That's what he used to call it. A D I'm in a DDP. I can, I better not look fat. You don't. Okay. So  then you should take Nina West. Okay. 

So then you're in a DDP. So I was in a DDP. So then I started coming out of the DDP a little bit. Okay. Right. So then we go to New York where I also was able to be my full self. Because I really let go this last trip and I was like, Oh my God, I get New York.  I fucking get it now. , it's crazy.

You just got to let go. Yeah. It's like, you gotta be, you're kind of scared, but once you get unscared and you're just like, well, fuck it. Like, okay, let's go ride the subway. I'm taking three cocks. Well, no, that's the other thing. It is a little bit like take the leap because so are there's 7 million other people.

Like go for it. It's literally like, are you going to be the one? Right.  First of all, subway,  you're going to be the one. And if you are, maybe you're special. Honestly, touch. Think about that, though. , think about that. If you got shot or something, or something happened to you really bad somewhere, you're kind of unique.

Well, you will be remembered more than most people. Well, and thank God. You'll be in some news stories. That's when we'll finally make it. I will never. I mean, it's it. After I'm dead.  But just bury your ass and call it a day. I think my niece and nephews will remember me for a little while, and then that's it.

But that's what's crazy about it. So then why does it matter?  Nothing matters. Listen to that song again. I know. And that's what's making this whole nothing matters thing is like, yeah, it does matter though, because I can feel it when I say nothing matters. I mean, it totally matters, but also it doesn't matter other things.

They want us to think matter. The things that are not important. Correct. Their job title. Correct. , why, why do I go to a fucking place and sit in a box all day long? Go, we got to get some work. We got to get some work. And it's like, What if we all just kind of sat back and  decided to help each other out in a way, but not  what if we go live on a farm and just raise animals and plants and live  it's so true.

It's either I want to, I either want to go to New York city or I'm going in an RV across the country.  That's the two things that are going to happen in the next five years. I'm telling you, I'm done. I'm, I'm ready to, I'm ready to go. Pull out of my retirement. I'm ready to stop paying taxes. You got in there.

I mean, I've got a lot I mean, I got enough that I don't have a lot. I don't have a lot of work there five years But that's the thing. I I don't make that great of money. I haven't made that great money I didn't consider it a lot. Yeah, so I mean, but I have it I have I'm on track or something Okay, then that's that's actually really good Do you know the person who got car that I can't even tell I'd have to google it But it's a devastatingly small number a lot of Americans who are on track Well, a lot of people don't  the thing is though and the thing is like what is what is on because then what happens?

Then you get cancer and die and then you write what the fuck was I doing this for that's why it's like, okay I'm glad it's there in the background, but I don't think about it. Nope. I told my financial advisor that too I was like, I'm not thinking about it.  You're not gonna make it you're like I tell him I'm glad I'm on track, but I'm not going to think about it every day.

I'm not going to wonder how much more could I put in right now? Should I have saved this? I should skip that trip so that I can save another 2, tell you, you're going to be on your deathbed and be like, why did I have to get an extra 2, 000 when I could have been in Peru?  Liter. It's so fucking true. It's so stupid.

It's  when we were shopping for the hotel, for this trip. Exactly. The hotel that we got has a rooftop pool. Amazing. Like the best views in city location is right there. Apparently that it's the Flatiron building right there. It's called The Nomad. Yes. And actually, apparently it's  a really cool neighborhood right now.

So I'm kind of excited, but I didn't even know it, but I was like, I know we got , I got a deal on Reddit too. Well that's why I'm like. I, yeah, it would've been 20 something.  It was still kind of, but  booking, it was literally a i a thousand more. I know because I was  2,400 because we saved like, because you were like, I got the sky.

I was like, you got that one. And on booking it's like I, 2,400, 3000 know. I know. I can't, but that's the point is like, why are we worrying about an extra this or that? Right? , what does it matter? It's going to, you're going to either, do you really, it doesn't matter. I don't think matters. I look at my job too.

And , there's people who don't show up and they don't get in trouble. But yet if I, if you think for one second, I'm going to call in, I'm so nervous. I don't. And I see her thinking , why? I do so much, and yet these people over here don't give a flying fuck, and I'm like, it might be better just to be a fucking They show up, that's it. 

And that's really I'm not doing anything extra at my work anymore. No more. Yeah, no more. I've decided, I'm like, I'm out. I forgot to tell you something. Mentally, like  I'm just going to do what I need to do. I'm going to get my paycheck and I'm going to live my life. Because that's every day at four o'clock.

I don't, I don't, I don't live to work. I work to live. That's period. Like, I don't want to be your friend. I don't want to go to a meeting after work and go sit at TJ Fridays. I'm getting out of fucking control too. I'm like, Oh, Another emergency meeting.  I'm not doing it. I'm not another meeting. That literally it's somebody going, okay, let's get started.

And it's like, I'm going to look at these and there's no input you can give. There's nothing you can really learn from it. Cause it's like literally a sheet of paper that you put in the background. They just talk and then two hours of question and answering that. I'm like, okay. And half those, we have submitted ahead of time and just gotten a written report.

Half of those people, when they ask questions, they don't even know what they're asking, half of them don't understand. They just want to hear their voice. They're like, well, I'm just trying to figure out.  It's like, you weren't listening. Okay.  Right. It's just so, so do the bare minimum at work is the answer.

Cause it does not matter. Nothing matters.  That's what I kind of like though. You get to pick what matters.  You can decide that  gardening to you and your backyard garden is the most important thing to you and you'll put so much love and effort into it. It'll probably become the best garden for you when you.

Put your energy into something and you for you release it all it will become great and other people might notice, but yeah  Is it for you is it so that's what I've learned about this podcast you actually there was this good for you Yes, yes, cuz I love the creative side of it, right? So it doesn't matter if there's a 1, 800 million dollar fucking paycheck at the end or nothing It's what I like to do, right?

And I, at first it wasn't, I wasn't thinking that way. No, you were trying to, I was trying to manifest. We're going to make it and we're going to quit our jobs and go live this life. And it's like, okay, well, how about we just sit around and talk and talk shit? Because at the end of the day, , it doesn't matter anyway.

 Nothing fucking matters. So anyway. Okay. So this has been another episode of not well, literally, I'm like, we didn't mean to get that deep, but we did get very fucked. Sorry. I was like, yeah. That song, that song did it to me. I'm telling you. Taylor Swift did it to me today. And actually I'm really excited for the new Billie Eilish album.

Oh, I know. Compared to Taylor's release, she's going to do a really carbon neutral way. Oh, I didn't know that. She's not releasing 20 different versions. And then a second album. And then a CD vinyl. Do I have stuff on me? I thought you were telling me I  panicked. I panicked because then you started doing it and I was like, wait, do I have something? 

Okay. Well, I think I know why you're doing that. Oh, bruh.  Yes, you're right. Because it's definitely starting to get a little hazy in here.  Oh, it is 420. Happy 420, everybody.  Which I had a whole meltdown about that today. Is there something hanging from it?  No. Oh, look at Harry Tongue. Is it a Pam? It's a Pam.

It was a she's a shutter. That's okay. It's gone.  Oh, we're like a doghouse now. It's so gross Amazing how one tiny hair causes that reaction, but three cocks doesn't do a thing.  I Literally was like I'm gonna throw up  Hair and then it's like, okay, but I'm eating ass a little bit of the week. So it's like night Why did the hair bother me?

It didn't it shouldn't have  Okay, so I'm an idiot. You're a fucking dumbass. Yeah, you shouldn't have live once I have an activity for us because I was unable to produce results on this on my own. I Would I read something shocking?  About Neil Patrick Harris.  Oh, no. Yeah, so Apparently,  after  Amy Winehouse died, Neil Patrick Harris at his Halloween party had a meat  designed Amy Winehouse corpse cake. 

Yes. And there's a picture out there on the internet, but it's damn sure hard to find. So we gotta fucking find it because it's being brought up again because there's a new documentary about Amy Winehouse being released. And that comes up, I think, somehow. Or, , this new documentary brought people together.

To that memory and then they're just sharing it. What are you? Oh, you're actually looking I can't we got to take that thing off  The screen protector, by the way  The people are  take what thing off  That could be the name of the episode Amy Winehouse a meat cake  come on come on. Oh That was it.

Yeah, I found it right away  Duh, babe read it. That is horrifying  That was , I thought it like a That's so bad. Actually, that's not what I pictured. I didn't, I pictured it made out of  meat or  icing that looked like meat. So it was  a cake that they could eat. Oh, that's so scary. That's so bad.

It's like, it's really, I know. I didn't expect that. I thought it was  a, it's a cake. ? Well, I think it's a meat platter. Maybe  . I'm gonna throw up, was it a, it was a Halloween. Party's like a on it. Yeah. I mean it's, it's creative. Yeah, but it's kind of  morbid. She just died. So it was like, and that's, I mean, gays can be silly that way sometimes.

Once they're dead, it doesn't matter. That's poor woman. Yeah. Oh, that there's a perfect example. Bad documentary, I mean, hurts terrible. It's a trauma life. And then, yeah, it's just a trauma. And she wasn't even that. I mean, she was traumatized, but  she kind of traumatized herself too in ways , I'm not blaming her, I'm blaming the drugs. 

No, I feel like drugs took her over and that was it  some people can't do drugs you escape into drugs You go to the drugs to escape the trauma  but  then I'm like, oh, but I'm gonna be hungover or I'm gonna see I have a different brain. My brain's just if well when you're an alcoholic you don't get hungover cuz you're constantly drinking Well, you wake up you wake up and you have a headache, but you just drink and then you don't well That's a vacation.

I've asked alcoholic sex. I was always like don't you just how do you bounce back? I'm not like this weekend. Don't you feel this? Just terrible all the time and they're like, no, I don't feel terrible. I never feel bad I'm like, they're like, I only feel bad if I stop I'm like, oh, okay You imagine drinking  a week straight and then being like I get sober.

Yeah, that would hurt. That's called my family vacations But no, you're right. No, it's true.  Last time I went on a family vacation for seven days. I was like Well, that's family in Myrtle Beach. I was like, I think I had eight beers minimum a day. You would start at 11 Yeah, noon on through midnight.  Wait a minute.

Yeah, that's not even one an hour. So that's my thing at least Yeah, like you're just constantly kind of buzzed. There's like Yeah, it's like we, I love my favorite thing in the world, and I probably said this before, but my favorite thing in the world is to be drunk as fuck on a beach.  When you go with your friends on a beach and you're all just laying there giggling and all of a sudden you're all kind of  beer drunk.

 You're like, oh, fuck the beer drunk. It's fun when it's hot out in the sun and that's when everybody has to pee and you're like, let's go in the ocean and pee. Gotta go with the ocean. And it's like, I heard that you shouldn't do that because apparently a little jellyfish can go in there and sting you. 

I heard that from my boss. I don't know if it's true. He just wanted to, that sounds like something you tell your kids not to pee in the pool or the ocean . I know you're like. If you open, if you open that pee hole, something's gonna climb on in there. Well, there is  a river fish or something that does that in the Amazon, I think.

No, but there's, I think in the ocean, there's little, there's, it depends on where, , what's happening in the ocean, obviously. I mean, I've peed in the ocean my whole life, I've never had a fish. I was gonna say, well, girl, well. And maybe that's Is that what that growth is? Maybe that's the problem. You got a jellyfish down there?

I'm like, wait, why do I keep seeing a little clear Yeah, it's , a tentacle coming out of the middle. Yeah, that's what I pictured. A little yeah, , whoop! Just kidding! The guys at the eagle are like, what the fuck? I'm like, yeah, my dick has a dick. That's his kink. My dick has a dick. Awww, that's kinda cute. 

That is kinda cute,  a shirt that says, my dick has a dick. Yeah, that's it. That means you have a lot of dick. You're dealing with a lot of dicks in your life. A lot of dick. Okay. So you really  getting drunk on the beach. Yeah, I do. Well, I'm so ready for Mexico. I'm not. I'm just ready for all of our trips.

I know. I know. This is the summer of Bobby and Jim. I mean, honestly, we're starting, , we're both fairly, I don't have anything in July yet. And I don't even know if I have all of July off. All of July? No, I can make it off, I mean. So maybe we can go to a weekend,  I don't have a schedule yet. We can do  a weekend at a campground or something.

Oh, that's, yeah, that's a good idea. Oh God, yeah. Actually, that's a good idea. Mm hmm.  Why not? I just realized in Columbus that there's a lot of, , twinks that I would definitely fuck, but if I didn't have to see the face. Do you know what I'm saying? I agree because because I've seen some things on the interwebs on Twitter Where it's  the body's gray ish.

I mean twink. It's twink The ass is kind of but it's tiny so it's easy to get in You know what? I'm saying easy to get in the front It's  a nice little tiny average twink cock and I'm like, I love an average twink cock. It's just a little I know My thing is this and I'm gonna ask you but then  you go up  and then it's like  Yep, this is a bunch of fives.

Oh, you have a body. Great. But that face,  it's disgusting. Like there were  four. Most people are ugly as Columbus. Everybody I see here is ugly as shit. So there you go. There's someone named Nate Nate, Nate, or whatever. I don't even know what the fuck his name is. It's the perfect example. No, but I wanted to ask you, do you,  is this just me or is like older guys?

I don't want to be all over their cock. I want them to be all over me. But younger guys, I want to be all over them. Absolutely. Is that  a thing though? For me it is. But is that like we were talking about last week, where it was like, the guy was , well older guys Due to the hierarchies of life, I'm not going to lust after some old man.

Right, cause So he better be all over me. What is oh god, that is wild. Ageism. Yeah, but that's not even ageism, it's more , natural.  Natural order of life.  Well, yeah. I mean, cause older people are supposed to take care of you. Yeah. So you're not like an older man should take care of me. Even sexually, honestly, look me up and down, but don't be too needy.

Cause some of y'all need to learn how to not keep continuing talking. I know. And that's the message from God. Some of them , do your thing. Yeah. Stop talking and don't text me 65, 000 times after that. I'm so hot.  Very specific. I'm not actually a fan. Yeah. I don't remember this person. You don't know the first time.

Like I'm going to freak the fuck out. No, it's just going to flip a table. There's just some people don't know how to handle a hot person hooking up with them. And then maybe they're not as hot, but it was  kind of a,  it was a moment in time. You're like, Oh, you know, I need to get my dick sucked at lunch or whatever.

And, but just, it's, oh my God.  Yeah. At lunch I kinda actually have a secret life lately. Yeah. I didn't open up the door. Why haven't you shared any of this? What were you, what started that conversation? 'cause I think that was going, getting your naughtiness, your recent? No. Okay. Back before that. Oh, I just, I was just talking shit.

I'll find a place. Oh yeah. 'cause T Twinks we were talking about the people and you're like, if you're a, if you're, yeah. So if you're older or who, which daddy is this? Do I know him? No. That's weird. Yeah. Never seen him. Nope. . You know, so I always just of my shit, but . I think I maybe have sent  a semi, like a naughtiness.

I bet you've never sent a hard dick pic. No. Yeah, I can see that not happening. Why would I? I don't know. You're very flirtatious with it in person. I just have never, well, no. The first time I sent a nude was last year.  I'd never sent an actual full whoa girl fuck.  Dick out nude. I've sent as shots before this.

You're a big eyeshot guy on  a side or a side hold. Yeah. But no cock shot. You haven't been giving yours out left and right for the, except for the past year. No.  Baby girl. I used to post my cock on Craigslist. No I know that, I mean in your adult life, since you came out, out. Oh, yeah.  I show my dick, although I have private albums.

I'm kind of a, I'm kind of a secret whore, but I like doing it on my own terms. That's what I'm trying to tell you this whole time. Weird. Okay. Yeah, it's weird. And then I go on little phases cause guys are gross. And then all of a sudden I'm like, Ooh, it's hot again. It's weird. Oh my God. Oh my God. Am I bisexual?

I'm anti sexual. What's it called? Asexual.  Yeah, antiquated. You could be asexual. Speaking of a bunch of asexuals. I came across a TikTok and I know this is, might be an old news story, but I have got to show you this situation at hand. Okay. There is a alpha male. Course that you can sign up for boys and I feel  the guys taking the course are our types Well, they totally are they're like to be on in real life, but they're right hot.

I know it Yeah, but  you've got to see this shit, but they pay 18, 000 for three days at this Bootcamp. I swear to God,  it is wild. Here's why. Here's why. Here's why. Are you touching me? Are you touching me? Are you get the fuck off me. Get the fuck off me. I'm not little bitch. I'm not touching you, bitch. 

All of you get in the fucking tubs. Get in the tubs. Every one of you. What are you going to do now? What are you going to do now? Everyone of you get in the tubs. Get in the tubs. Get in the tubs. Shut up. There is no respect. Get in the tubs. You are going home. I know you like to sit down. You're not going to the fucking tubs.

I mean this shit is so What is this by the way? This guy is Are these incels? And actually apparently he's not a real He's  That's enough! I'm sick of you! You think you're fucking good, bad ass, don't you? You wanna know what else happens? Let's go! Take your shit off! Take your shit off! Take your fucking shit off!

Take your shit off! TAKE YOUR SHIT OFF! I feel so bad. 29! 1, 2, 3! 1, 2, 3! 1, 2, 3! 1, 2, 3! 1, 2, 3! 1, 2, 3! 1, 2, 3! This was  a far right thing too.  I, I, yeah, that's 18,000. What? This is 8,000.  Instead of joining the military, you're in a paramilitary organization. This is what they do. It's very, like you said, the insoles it are those things called that the guys that don't have sex and they're , incel. 

I don't think it's Ancel. Is it? Look it up. You, you have TikTok honey type in, what's it? Incel. It's INC. Is it the one that's don't have sex in celibate? Yeah. Okay.  And then they go like, usually they're the mass shooters. What is the word, the first word? I know, that's what I'm saying, there's another word.

Before it though. No, there's not a whole other word. How do you spell incel? I N C E L That's what I thought, but it doesn't show up. Involuntary celibacy. It doesn't show up, so that's why. Involuntary celibacy. Right, so then they like, they sign off women, and gays, and blacks, and they go after all of them, right.

It's kind of embarrassing, because honestly, look at your clock. Is that why you're not getting fucked? Look at your dick. Right, right. I mean, first of all, we all know that you have a little dick if you're attending these, uh. Right, I know, it's just sad. Because then they all can stand around their little dicks and be like, yeah, we're all average.

It's like, no. And it doesn't matter that you're not, but you're so fucking, you've glorified your cock. You can't glorify the cock, put the cock off the pedestal. Okay. Your own car. Can't glorify the cock. You can't glorify his advice and don't glorify your own cock because at the end of the day, there's somebody's cock.

Who's better than yours. Can I tell you something about, uh, mustaches?  Yes. And I'm not saying yours is this. I'm just saying it triggered my thoughts of this,  a little broom room. Womb room. No, but.  There. I think lips should be visible. Mm. That's how I feel about mustaches. Yeah. 'cause some people don't.

Not you. I do. And mine's not even a good mustache. My mustache sucks. . I can't, but I'm not gonna be an O Well not lose weight. I might shape my whole face. So you could be Amish. Yeah. That, yeah. What is this? No. Yeah, I don't like that. I like, and it always goes down a little bit like that. How am I supposed to kiss you with your, like, look at this.

It's over the teeth. It's over the teeth.  And he's the type of kisser that's gonna be like  And that, so those hairs right there are going in It's just, it's never trimmed, ever Yeah, yours is  way trimmed up at the top  you have to make sure your lips are showing honey Cause I'm gonna make out honey, you gotta show off your goods I need to shave my neck Same, I'm  Not tonight bitch, tonight doesn't matter Tonight doesn't matter, tonight's the night  So yeah, the incel thing though, , I mean, that's wild to me.

 I was thinking , like, can I say like any more? Like fucking like times listening to you? I'm like, honey, it's fully hit him. Um, no, but I just thought it was so bizarre. You watch these kids. Who are like, I don't, I don't matter in the world and they go to this fucking camp and have their parents pay 8, 000 in the roll around in fucking mud and get sprayed by a hose water.

First of all, it's hose water. Hose water girl. Hose water girl. Actually, what I've been thinking, yeah, So I have another story. Oh, I have some stuff too. Oh, really? Yeah. Normally you don't like last week. Uh, wait, no, but I, Oh, wait, no, I don't know. But I have something I saved.  I was doing, yeah, I want to say, Oh, there was a fucking guy that caught himself on fire outside of the Trump thing today.

Did you see CNN's coverage?  It is so unhinged.  He has set fire to himself. A man has emblazoned himself outside of the  courthouse just now. Our cameras are turning right now. A man has now lit himself on fire outside of the courthouse in Manhattan where we are waiting for history to be made. A full jury panel is gone.

We are watching a man who was fully emblazoned in the front of the courthouse today. We are watching multiple fires right now around his body and person. We have seen an arm that has been visible that has been engulfed in total fire. Flames chaos that is happening. People are wondering right now, if people are  in danger, I'm looking across the court, across the courtyard.

There is a man racing to his knees. There's coats coming off to try to put out the fire. We have members of securing details. NYPD is rushing to the scene. Officers are on the scene. A fire extinguisher is right now present being put on this man. It's right now present being put on this man. People are climbing over barricades to try to separate the public to put out the flames on this man.

He has lit himself out in front of the courthouse right now. We are watching as they're playing. We can smell the air. I can smell the burning of some sort of a flesh. I can smell the burning of some sort of agent being used as an accelerator to put out the fire. I smell an actual fire extinguisher having been displayed.

I can smell an actual fire extinguisher having been displayed. I see a person who appears to be on the ground being surrounded by officers. Is this the description for the blind? Is this the description for the blind? This guy here is like, oh shit. Continues to continue to blaze. We right now have officers removing their coats trying to surround this person.

What is happening? To engulf their body to prevent them from further going into flames. You can smell. I'm sitting here with Evan Perez. You can smell burning flesh. Do you know what happened? I feel like what happened is she had a total panic moment and went back to reporting one on one where in class and college say exactly what you're saying.

See exactly. Yeah, exactly. I am smelling, I am smelling the flame retardant and I can smell a fleshy kind of smell. It smells like bacon. Almost good. Like my breakfast burrito. But it doesn't look like a sausage log. We see a bone sticking out of the flame. It's like,  why are you telling us? There is an arm that has been visible.

It has been fully englobed in flames. He is emblazoned in flames. The flames are all consuming. Now people are jumping over barricades around the police to tear off the other people who are trying to save him.  They are removing their coats to put around him. She went into Full panic, reporting 101. Or she's like, this is my shot.

I mean, I've never seen her before. She's like, this is it. She should go work for the like you went into I was gonna say this is gonna be really or the blind She's kind of lesbian. So she works for the WNBA radio  Okay, the Indiana Fever I could see that number four comes on Clark. She's crossing over the half court line She's doing a double dribble Be an announcer for sure hockey it to  she could be  into the data  she was just like and then he shouts And then he scored but really you need to think that was perfect for the blind and I'm bringing that up because we don't have that Can you imagine trying to watch the news as a blind person?

No. Well, obviously you can't watch the news as a blind person. So you listen to the news, but, but  during a live event, you do. People could just be like, he's  someone put himself on fire. We're watching live. The burning of a man who lit himself on fire, but you're not describing a full Maybe she has good.

That is good. I know I thought it was fuck I was like I could close my eyes, but I was dying laughing because what the fuck Cuz she was very  standing to be like I think I'm gonna call Next time, let's not. And I'm here with Evan Perez, , why was that there? Evan Perez could actually smell the flesh too.

Evan, you smell the flesh back to you. Evan. Evan. Flesh, flesh,  . , it smells like white flesh. Um, it's like, do you know the word for meat in German is flesh like flesh? Flesh, like flesh? No, but gross. Isn't that gross? Isn't that gross? Flesh, you know, want something like  cia? Want some flesh? I'm still kind of  scarred by the Amy Winehouse cake.

I know, I don't want meat ever again Well, I haven't had meat since 2000. I don't want meat. I don't want meat. I have another video too that I found. You're just a fart. You're just a fart. Look at my nuts  and then go apart. Pull them apart. You are going to fucking die. Okay, I'm not ready. You're not ready.

This is oh my god. Okay.  Young white boy. I watched this. I thought they make white people big. What the f What happened to this guy? Let's hope he's big down here as well. Young white boy, how old are you? 20. Say it again. 20. Plenty of consent. This white boy came here.  And he came here for one reason only.

Didn't you? Two buttons, two glorious  I got kind of hard at work. Actually, that blonde guy. 

Pig stitching  everywhere on the semi notch. The pel, check out the sure. My pocket square undersized flat pockets, fully pig stitch flat pockets, fully line flat pockets overlapping buttons on a fully functional cuff. This very short white boy is absolutely gif wrapped in my four D fit. Let me open 'em up.

I I want short white opening up little people. That's what he is, that's what you call them in the United States and in the western world. Little people. Well, let's look at this little left.  He is absolutely gift wrapped, I mean, absolutely gift wrapped by 4DFIT. And all white people descend upon China for one reason only, a Chinese massage, and nobody gives them a better Chinese massage than me. 

Little, little, little, little white boy. Are you happy? Yes. Thank you. I don't know what. Wait, what did we just didn't watch the ending right after like showing the ass, I moved on. I was like, I get it.  Oh, weird. Actually, let's first of all, your pants. No, I actually was kind of like, Oh, that's kind of hot. Not I want it, but I wanted to do that to the like the whole  face thing.

I was like, Oh, that's kind of hot. , we just got out of the shower. I just want a tiny little white boy. Oh, that was 18 plus. Yeah, well, he was 20. Yeah, I'm gonna be able to be sober. Yeah, and drive. I'm just , I can't imagine a 20 year old. First of all, that was  a guy selling suits, by the way, for real selling.

I think it's good though. It did look fucking great. So I was like, if I, Oh, so that's part of the gimmick.  You go get a suit and he does that to you. I think so. Let's go. Maybe it's in York. Oh, that would probably be the ones. Oh yeah. Choking gets me all you want. I'm sorry, but when a straight guy grabs me  and puts me in his elbow.

I  does this right here. Just even just .  I'm like, I know, I, I need to stop. So that's, I know, this is so safe for me. If you do this to me and I'm in, I'm in a big panic, if I'm in a panic, if you just do this to me, this is for everyone out there.  I'll be safe. I'll feel safe. Not hard. Just like a nice little, , make sure I'm taking my doxy peps.

We might have to, you probably ran out. Um, no, actually judging by the way you've been at, no,  I mean,  I do think I'm in my whore era. I really, actually I'm freaking out now because of the other, it's a quiet, it's a quiet visits. Yeah. There's been some extracurriculars. But I also don't want to talk about it cause it's kind of , yeah, why sometimes this is so bad.

I just, I really like to be pampered. Sorry. I don't want to do anything to you. I literally don't even want to look at you. I want to lay down butt naked and you rub my entire body with oils and I don't want to talk to you. I don't want to touch your dick. I don't want to do anything. I don't want to rub your, I don't want to do any of that.

I want to lay there. You actually stay clothed unless you're hot. Okay. No sick. Yeah. But even if you're not, you have good hands. That's great. Rub me down and I need you to rub me down good and play around in the bar to me.  I am so about that. , I don't want to fuck you. I don't want to touch you. I don't want to do anything.

I'm going to lay here. You fucking handle my body and make me.  I am that way too. Okay. The reason people that here's where I'm laughing though, because  I've never told anyone this. I, well, okay, here we go. Not even Matt. Oh, I actually lost a relationship because I'm such a pillow.  I'm not kidding. I am.

Literally got like this guy that I was with I was obsessed with him. It was one of my uh oh guys like an uh oh feeling and I let him give me a blowjob one night and it was  the best blowjob I've ever had and after it was over I just  rolled the side and  kissed him and I was , that was great.

And I just laid there. I didn't do anything for him. Oh my. And then I think I did that again.  And he left you. Did he say like, I'm done? No, no, that's not why. He was also  semi alcoholic at the time and going through things. Wow, it's weird that you decide to find a hot guy that's an alcoholic that's going through some things.

Okay. He had a reason. He had a reason. He's not Well, let me guess. So, okay, let's This is the one where I hooked up with his ex boyfriend first while they were together. didn't realize they were together, then they were breaking, they were in the process of breaking up. I started hooking up with him, my boy, ex boyfriend.

Okay. Okay. So I kind of, kind of, while they were not fully broken up, I was, he was sneaking in and sneaking out. And then, yeah, the one night I slept in their bed. Cause,  Oh, the truth, listen, the truth is coming out tonight. Ladies and gentlemen, this is a special report. I don't know what's happening. What's in the Kool Aid.

I was such a these like it's these it's this IPA phase two, baby nocturne. I'm in phase two. So the one night I, I don't need to get the name B. I'm going to give the name. Yeah. B B's always a B was the guy that I hooked up with. I hooked up with B from a party. and had no idea that he even worked where I worked.

That's how there was a problem.  It's  a work type event.  B then introduced me to his partner. They'd been together. Yeah. C and B had been together for  seven years, eight years, like a long time. They'd moved to different cities together. That type of two dogs together type thing.  Yes. And they had a house.

So I find out like a year later, I Start hearing from that partner. See, see, was telling me about being their problems and they're breaking up. So I'm starting out with C, but then the hanging out turned into a little more comfort than just a pat on the back. Correct. I think we were  drinking until I was listening a lot and you know,  I'm telling you, I love a good, and then he's coming into me and then the making out and he was real.

I mean, he's so good. You're all about 12 inch cop, 12 inch.  Whoa,  girl, 12. I'm not a fan. Neither was I. I didn't let that thing even get inside. Didn't even get in. I said, I can't because it was all like big deck. I don't either. Okay. So, but that is the guy. So I go over to the house to hang out with him and then be with C with C.

Okay. B comes home. They have, they've  ended the relationship and we're fighting together, but they're still in this living house.  So C, , moves me upstairs to hide in the bedroom. I hide in the bedroom. I'm,  like, in a crumpled up pile of pillows and blankets, like, under the blanket, on the bed, on the bed. 

And he, B, did not see me. And then C comes in the room, and we spent the night. Wait, so B left then? B slept in the other room. Cause they were broken up at that point, but in the same house. So a, oh my God, when I had to get up to pee, I had to be so quiet. Cause he, you know, C is like, B's going to hear you.

B's going to know you're here. And I'm like, what's good. Is he going to kill me? I was like, really thought about that in the middle of the night. I'm like, how do I, I barely slept. I barely slept. Cause I was like, B's going to wake up. And then B's going to be standing over you , morning pal. I don't think he ever found out. 

I'm not kidding. , I really don't, to this day. That is so scandalous. So.  Actually, yeah, that's pretty scandalous. That's pretty, um, yeah.  I mean, I love, you know, I mean, and then when me and C fell apart, cause C was dealing with too much and it just come out of a nine year relationship and look what we did together.

So, so you were that guy for him for  nine months and then it was like, no, or not even, no, not even. It was  five months. It was so short. I mean, sometimes you need those short flings though. I really, do you know how it started?  I just remember how it started.  Did I tell you this? I think so. Maybe.

I'm really confused. Really?  Okay. I don't think B and C is characters in your mind. Right? No, I am. Okay. So C is when you're fucking. But then you ever hook up with B? I did.  I started with B. B is how I found C. B is where I started. So I was friends with B though throughout the time they were together. Still,  I was friends with them.

When they were together, I was friends with both of them. So.  When you were laying with C and B was in the room. I was still his friend. Did a, you're a or J  person. A  goes home. Do they call a person B then be like, Hey girl, what are you doing tonight? While C still sleeping in the bed that you just sucked his dick. 

That's no, because they were, I'm saying like, like double timing, like, Oh, you're my, no, because I went, I just, I just went to, I went and hooked up with C really quick after the breakup. Right,  really fast. Next month or so. I think I was  hanging out with him a month after it happened. He came to me to tell me all the stories and the trauma and how hard it is.

And then I started reeling in  the amount of drinking and then he's on the couch with me and it's like, duh.  We're gonna make out. I'm a make out queen. You are, you love it. You like to do this , you try to do the look.  It works every time. 50 percent of the time it works every time. I don't want to make out like just suck my dick or just leave me alone.

But I think what I'm saying is that you think I'm a makeout queen and I want to get all involved and I'm a top and all that. And yes, those are all true.  Underneath all of that is I am a pillow princess. And that's why I told that whole story because with C I literally was like, I don't really want to deal with that.

It's too big. I just don't want to deal with it.  I'm not doing this.  I'm not doing this. I couldn't, I could not. Well, no, I can't. Look at these teeth. You don't have any, there's no wiggle room.  That is, no, I can't suck a dick. I actually hate sucking dicks. I do too. In a weird way. I like them when they're like.

Not if it's public and that doesn't count.  I'll do public anything, honey. I'll, I'll public bother. Isn't it funny how. When you were talking about the sling, I was like. I would do it. You'll just try it Honestly. I mean, I would bleed so bad, but I would  try it. I honestly thought I was like, once you get one in , the rest is, I thought that even if it tears in the first one, then it's tore.

Well, I need to, God,  I'm a little torn . This is how I feel. Know that I'm,  I naked, get on the floor. Yeah, so that, so I think we're both fellow princesses and we've admitted it. Well, yeah. Oh no, I'm fully app. I know that. I know that you, I don't wanna deal with it. I'm lazy. I'm lazy. No, I am too. I don't want to fuck.

I don't know how many times Matt has put up with me being like, nope, go back down.  Or I'm like, real quick, and I'm like, all right, and then I'm like, it's bad. It's bad. He knows. He knows I'm a tired boy. I think they're, but I think every relationship has their pillow prince is in there. It's necessary.

What's the other one? He puts in so much hard work.  Harold, the hard, hard work, Harold, hard work, Harold, hard work, Harold, pillow princess. Which one are you?  Matt is a hard work. Harold says, Michael,  he'll work, work it and work it and work it until it works. And sometimes it doesn't. And so he'll keep working.

Oh, and that's also happened. Hungry, hungry hippos.  I call him a hungry, hungry hippo in the bed. I just called him that last time we had sex.  He's a hungry hungry hippo some people like I'm like fine go to work I don't understand people with come either  I'm sorry. No, I'm sorry, but I don't want your no Listen, no, there are people that want to keep your come now so they can taste it later.

Oh, oh, they're like  So good. I'm like, nope Hi. I just came. So first of all, none of this works for me right now. Just came over. It's over. Yeah. Like I'm done. Like none of it even, it's not even the body. Nothing matters  the kissing, the thought of to me after that, it's like I think, are you done?  I cannot even look you in the eye while we're doing, or actually I get a little.

He comes, I get, cause he, I usually come first. I'm always like, I'm just going to go same. And then I'm like, all right, come on, come on. And I'm like, so then once he comes in, I'm , Ooh, babe, touch my dick.  I'll  pretend. So  it annoys him. Cause he just came, you know what I'm saying? Cause I had to play with his already came.

Yeah. But it's  five minutes. I know when you have to do this, it really hurts your wrist at that point too. You're not motivated. The dopamine is not flowing. It's over. It's over there. Adrenaline's gone. So you're just like, ow, this really kind of hurts my shoulder. I had a cramp. Yeah. Oh, let me tell you, I've been on the mic.

No, it sucks. Why do you think you have to keep the sex down to  less than two times a week? And this is where I feel like they're going to take too long to come. That's right. Oh yeah. But I feel like you need to let them build it up. That's I'm telling you. I'm not kidding. It's not built up for two weeks.

Yeah, perfect. That's like my new thing to do it. I like edge. If you come to all week and then in the weekend, I'm just like, Oh, right. That's what I do. That's my life. I don't want to come during the week. I don't want to come home and come. No, I want to come home and go to bed.  Tell that to Matt. I need you to do Bobby.

When you're editing this, go look at the replay of my eyes. I literally just did this. I know I was like, I was looking here, but I was talking here. And I was like, it was just bizarre. So just you've had multiple moments, honey. I don't want to come home and come now. I want to come home and go to bed.  Have I?

Am I bad? No. I did something bad. Good. Why does it feel so good? Just so you know, by the way, I'm trying to, and I don't want to jinx it by telling you but, I think, I've realized I'm trying to make Slay. Be  the summer's word well, okay, you know what I mean? It's just like so many times Yeah, you have been you're like slay that nap.

I'm like, okay, and you slayed it and I did well Oh, you have an eye boogie in your beer. Why is this booger following me around?  We call them eye boogies. I bugged. Okay sundries. Let's just go  What is her sundry this week? Did I?  preach Did I send you that video of Matt making me change outside for shorts?

No, you didn't tell me about the Jewish guy either. Oh, should I tell about that or do you want to, or No, you don't have to. I don't wanna relive it. Okay. No, we don't have to. Drama. We don't have to. It was so bad. I really thought, I was like, well, this is it.  I was like, if he had a knife, I'd be, it'd be a, he was so upset.

Oh my God. Matt took pictures of me last night. How high these.  Oh, you and the baby.  Remember when I made fun of Nate earlier? That's his picture, by the way. But that, but he asked, but that's the thing. You're not  a 10. You're not acting like a 10. I don't have AI generated filters on my ass. What's happening here.

Now explain this situation. So Matt noticed that there was a 30 percent off American Eagle shorts special on his app or something. I don't really know how he knew. Girl, who's gonna get it right but gay so he starts shopping these like what size are you you should cuz I was like I need some new shorts I was just saying that like in general,  I'm going to go, I'm planning to go shopping before my trailer.

Obviously, honey, honey, you got to go to Puerto Vallarta a little style, right? I have to look at the swing and then you got to swing back  for New York, which I want to go shopping. I want it. Sure. It's like this. I want  representation of our city. Okay. I like that.  Not well.  We need some representation.

Ohio socks work high socks, baby for the Eagle or forever. We end up the Eagle high socks, Eagle, Eagle slot. I'm saying now that you found that new room.   When you described that, I was like, it's like, well, manners, there's lights on, it's not a dark room and they're not like police. Cause it's  red light though.

It's still dark. It's red light district. Oh, that's going to be too. I like a red light. Cause it makes everybody look the same. Everyone looks good. And you're like, yeah, you're hot. Except for that one bathroom in the upstairs. At new Orleans. I don't know if we were at the end of a situation. I just got  a horror feeling.

was like, Oh, I opened the doors.  That would be a good scene in  a show. No, I'm telling you, I walked in and we were like, Oh, it's red. And then we looked back and it was like, there's just a black guy against the wall, a little Asian on the ground. You're like a white guy getting full of sweat. I'm like, everyone's just like. 

Yeah, when we opened the door, they were like,  I know I was like, okay, wrong room, wrong place. Literally that. Oh yeah. We went to New Orleans this year. By the way. Do you remember that? Not at all. We're going to do all the news. New Orleans, New York. What's another new New Hampshire? Oh, that would be pretty a new Hampshire in the fall.

Oh, I would definitely, I would absolutely do that. A new Hampshire and all those villages fill up for people looking with people looking for the leaves. Of course. Of course. You already know. You're like people. Weird. We can go to. I have like New Haven, New Hampshire. Oh, great. You already have two dinner reservations.

Don't you? Well, honestly, and that's what they're too early.  Listen, I, there's nothing I hate more right now. And this is my new life and maybe this I've always been like this, but now I'm really fucking done with it. I don't need you to make a reservation because here's why I don't like having plans because what happens to me, this is just an autism trait.

We're all like, okay, okay. This is my sundry. If I have something to do at night. Like at seven o'clock. Okay. What always seems to happen is that day though, we're like, we're going to go do this. This, and then we have reservations at seven. Okay, cool. Well, when we're going and doing this and this, this and this is so much goddamn fun, but in the back of my mind, I'm always thinking, well, fuck, we have to go back.

I gotta, I'm sweating. I gotta go back and change. And Oh, it's formal. It's a process for you. I don't.  But then meanwhile, there's a restaurant right here. That's amazing. Where we met new people were giggling and laughing, but we have to go to reservations at the blah, blah, blah, blah.  And not saying just you, I'm saying in general,  people, I don't like plans on trips because I feel like the most organic things that happen are when you don't have fucking plans.

Think about when we go on trips and we don't have a plan. Seriously, like what happens was I tripped on the fucking concrete. Your shoes were being monitored. We were, I fucking had a gay guy that ended up being a psychopath. We met two gay guys at a bar and you were playing pool like a shithead. And I, you beat me.

 These are the things that happen when we don't have plans. Those aren't, some of these were plans. Because when you have plans, I had planned that.  No, you fucking did it. Cafe du Monde was an absolute must. Okay. But I'm saying like, yeah, well, okay. You're right. But that's not really a plan. No morning plans are fine.

And you planned that gay bar. No, morning plans Number thing number one number one miss number one thing in the day If you're gonna do something and you're gonna play with me, let's do it 9 a. m. Yeah. All right Yeah, I'll go get that and then we're done up Beth the plan for the day Okay, now we can just now let's just go float and then if you catch me on a good day I'll get drunk and then I'll have be really a lot of fun.

No, then that only happens once every three days Yeah, honestly, you should be ready for me. Well, I'm just I'm sorry, but New York we're going all out. Here's my time Here's my thing with you. Here's my thing view  I usually worry about what you think, but I know you're not anymore. I'm really not. I feel like this trip, you'll finally see that I really don't care.

You don't care, but you do like the guilt trip and it pisses me off, but I'll end up, I don't really care anymore.  I really don't care about anything.  I just don't. So I just  the guilt trip because of it works. Right. And that's why you like it. And then, you know, cause you're manipulating me cause you're a psychopath, but I'm the psychopath that can't handle it.

So,  and I'm like, Oh,  Oh, I guess we'll just go lay around. Oh, oh,  . Yes, it's revver. You're trying to reverse psychology, but I know you're doing it every time, so it's weird. But I know, I'm like, I still like laying around anyways, but I, but then I still get guilty though. And then I know you're like, gets a seed.

You know what? You should have gone and just done your like, fuck you.  I get so mad at him like I can't, that's why you listen this trip though. You're gonna realize we're act like solo. We're gonna be nuts. Like this trip, it's two single friends going on an adventure. Yeah. Like we're literally gonna be. I want to have like, I mean, I'm telling you, I want to be like really trendy.

I want to wear a little cut off and it says we're going to order some, we have to order online some things like six one four whore. I'm like, actually that is actually in a cut off. Yeah.  A big loop on six one four whores.  Oh no, wait. And that's how they remember is at the place at the right. One can be a crop top.

So instead of a harness, we can wear it as a crop top that night. Thank you. The next, but then we can have , we can come up with a couple different things. We, we have to, we don't wanna show cover our whole body. Fuck our sea bus or like, yeah. Or something stupid. Come take a ride on the sea bus. We're not like Christopher Columbus. 

We like Latinos. Come Ru  come, come ruin me. Like, because we do come ruin me like Christopher Columbus did.  I want to get monkey pox like Christopher Columbus. Oh, we're, we're immune. We're immune from monkey pox.  We're immune from monkey pox. We are immune from monkey pox. I think it really does decrease it. 

The risk of like severe illness. Honestly, I'm really worried about it. I'm  really worried. I'm  in New York. Well, because  it broke out again this past  fall. Right, but I'm immune. Are we? Yeah. Okay. I think we are. No, we have, we got two. I think my dogs are Okay. We got two. Oh yeah.

They're just out there. They're outside. Just in the gunfight. . Yep. They're in the gunfight. Well, good thing they're pit bulls. Um, they probably have guns. They're , like, fuck you. They're,  and then June, just eat a shoe laces and Pam will jump on 'em. Pam's doing the shooting. June is definitely eating shoelaces.

She's like, ah.  It's like, you're not even, you're not doing anything. Bitch. Like, bitch, you're not doing it.  Well, of course, I mean, that's like, that's  why I love her. Pam does not listen at all. Does she really not? She does not listen. No, she has been. She has not. She didn't jump this much. No. This time. Well, I.

She didn't jump as much. She's getting a shot caller. I'm sorry to shock her. Oh, she already has it. Yeah. Like I haven't put on her yet, but she, it's, we need to get her off. She jumps on every countertop. She jumps on people. Off. Penny's gonna bout, Penny's gonna bout to be getting one. Honestly, it's the best way.

If we let her out, She'll run away. She'll stand by you for 10 minutes in a row while you're picking weeds or be just sitting on the, uh, patio. Just on the swing. She sees Poppy across the street after even 10 minutes of being calm and relaxed and listening.  Across the street. That's, I mean, I saw a truck coming down the street at the other end.

She just like goes and I'm like, I about lost my mind. I was so mad. So it's shock collar time. It's shock collar time. It's time to get to learn some lessons. You don't run away from us. And honestly, some humans need them too. Maybe we should wear shock collars tonight. And if you're being bad, I'll shock you.

And if I'm being bad, you shocked me. I like that idea. It's kind of fun. That could be hot. It's a fun game. Well, we'll see some other podcasts do it and get 800, 000 likes because that's what literally is happening in our world. And that's your Sunday. My Sunday was already, what's your sundry?  I think yours, that was your sundry.

Yeah, it was. Which I don't even know was it I Was trying to agree to say like yeah sure and by the way, we're about to go out This is the beginning of the night. Not the end. Um  Fine well, I'm not drunk. You've had a few cocktails if you will. Yes, I for me I've had an edible so I'm like a little mix of I'm a mixture I would say  No, I gotta find an outfit to like girl. 

Yes, you can you're not gonna be sitting down. It's too short  Well, anyway, call us at 614 721 5336, subscribe, and also comment on anything that we post. Also, you can leave us a review and give us five stars.  Five stars. This has been another episode of Not Well. I am Bobby. And I am Jim. Thank you so much for joining us.

We will see you next week.  We really will. We really will. I was like, I'll be here. You'll be here.  Wait, you're going camping on Friday, Saturday, Sunday. We're not really going. No, but we'll be around. I'll be around. Yeah. Friday, Saturday. Yeah. That's next weekend though. So yeah. So next time you talk to me, next time you talk to me, I'll have naked stories and then you go to Mexico and then you're gonna have your stories.

Oh my God. Oh my God. Hopefully we get good ones. You will. Yeah, we will. It always happens. Okay. Goodbye. Bye.  Yeah, that's true. I forget about that. You always get good stories, bitch. True. Don't ever put yourself down.